Sons becoming fathers

“Your sons will take the place of your fathers…” (Psalm 45:16 NIV).

“He must manage his own family well, having children who respect and obey him. For if a man cannot manage his own household, how can he take care of God’s church?” (1 Timothy 3:4-5 NLT).

I sat out on my deck one evening this week talking with my son, Jonathan. He and his wife are expecting their second child any day (minute?) now. We talked about all the changes in his life… graduating seminary, becoming a military chaplain, being hired as a staff pastor at Discovery Church, moving to Greenville, NC… It’s enough to make anyone a little dizzy!

“So, aren’t you excited to finally be able to put your education and training to use?” I asked as we talked about his new role at Discovery.

“I am.” He answered, with a thoughtful look on his face. “But I’ve still got a lot to learn.”

“Sure, we all have to keep learning, Son. After all, great leaders are learners. They keep a teachable attitude, always stretching for…” I began, assuming he was talking about his role at church.

But interrupting me he said, “Yeah Dad. That’s true, but I’m not talking about my new role at Discovery. I’m talking about being a dad. I feel like I’ve got a lot of growing to do as a father and as a husband too. That’s why I’ve asked our senior pastor to mentor me in those two areas.”

“Really?” I responded. “Son, I think that’s awesome.”

It is a real blessing to watch my sons becoming fathers. Both of them are serious about being fathers. They love being “Daddy” to their children. They make it one of their top priorities.

My eldest son, Stephen, has been through a lot lately as a father. The loss of his newborn son, Conner has been a terrible blow to both he and his wife. I’ve watched in awe as they have navigated their grief while honoring Conner’s memory and giving all the glory to the Lord. Only their faith and constant dependence on Jesus has given them this endurance.

The loss of a son is a real test for a father. Everyone knows that fathers aren’t supposed to outlive their sons. But as Stephen said at Conner’s funeral, “I’m not the only one who has lost a son. Our Heavenly Father lost His Son too. He understands our pain, because He gave up His Son for us at Calvary.”

What a joy it is to see my sons become fathers. And to see them depending on our Heavenly Father for power and wisdom to lead their homes.

Their commitment to fathering their kids is the best Father’s Day gift this grandfather could ever have!